about your swimwear: cute cossies at figleaves

There are three reasons why I prefer swimsuits to bikinis:

1) They're nice and classic.
2) I simply do not have the body to be revealing that much flesh.
3) If I had a two-piece, I would lose half of it.  Never both parts, only one, and the remaining top or bottom would stick around and taunt me every time I opened the drawer.

But the problem is, every time I enter a high street store, the only stylish options are bikinis.  It's like the designers think they don't need to bother making pretty swimsuits because the only people who wear them are ugly folk who don't give two hoots about their waterside appearance.  Well, you're WRONG, high street swimwear designers!  Some people just like wearing one-pieces!  They reduce the risk of things coming undone and other things popping out!  It's a good thing figleaves know the value of a sexy swimsuit; they've got a whopping 245 of them on sale.  Take, for example, these four beauties:

Marilyn underwired halter swimsuit by Midnight Grace, £35

Polka dot swimsuit by Beach 2 Beach, £39

Just Black draped bandeau swimsuit by Seaspray, £73

Polka dots skirted adjustable ruching swimsuit by Seaspray, £73

Pretty, flattering AND smoking hot, all at once.  In your face, high street bikini bias!

Nomday! about your shop: Swank Jewellery

Do you ever have one of those days where you're just insanely busy and nobody is adoring you and everything is going wrong and you're pretty much just like AAAARGH? Of course you can't actually scream that out loud, because people might think you were unhinged or something, so maybe you just stick to thinking it or tweeting it. Or maybe you wear it around your neck to subtly remind people to give you a freaking break:

This AAAARGH necklace costs £22 from jewellery designer Swank, aka Becky Wignell. Based in Otley, Becky's designs are often made from recycled material (the chain on the above for example and her range of recycled Lego-themed necklaces are pretty squiffy geek-chic too), which means you can feel happy about what you're hanging round your hooters.

Also worthy of note are her really cool plane-related necklaces, which come in silver, gold or black-backed perspex. You know me, I love black and gold, it's so opulent and trashy:

Seriously cool, non? The F1-15 Fighter Jet necklace costs 30 smackeroonies and can be located by clicking this link here.

And then there's the Grumman Wildcat necklace, which also costs £30.

Lastly I want to show you my favourite, because it's named after a song which never fails to make me giggle and it's also AWESOME:

The Rock Lobster necklace costs £18 and comes in red, pink or gold perspex. Seriously cool. Which one should I choose, red or gold?

about your accessories: Kissing Stags by Anorak at Bloomsbury & Co

Call me soppy, but I always feel a nice glow inside when I see two individuals deeply in love, be they men, women or stags.  'Wait, what?' I hear you cry.  'Did you just say 'stags'?!'  I did, my dear, I did.  Stags are commonly considered very noble creatures (as evidenced by the tons of artwork depicting them standing atop various rocky crags in the same distinguished manner) but that doesn't mean they don't need a bit of tender love at times.  Stags are people too, you know.

That must have been what the people at Anorak thought when they made their range of oil cloth accessories featuring the noble beasts.  The 'Kissing Stags' range includes a purse (£7.50)...

...toiletries bag (£15.95)...

...and oil cloth for sale by the metre (£22.95/m), so you can entirely bedeck your home in the wonderful creatures!

The whole range is available from Bloomsbury & Co, and if stags aren't your thing*, they also have kissing rabbits, seagulls, birds and horses.  Aah, my cockles feel thoroughly warmed.

*Not like that.

about your dress: bird print maxi dress at George

It's been a while since I looked at the George website; as I don't live anywhere near an Asda and they're not on the high street, I need to be reminded of their existence through the medium of advertising.  It doesn't even have to be especially good advertising (no offence, George), I just need my memory jogging as to their existence.  Then I remember to visit their website (full of low low prices) and I always manage to find a gem.  This time, the gem came in the form of this bird print maxi dress:

And here's my imagining of how anyone checking you out - using the classic 'top to toe appraisal' technique - would feel if you were wearing this dress:

"Ooh, nice dress.  Navy, that's a good, sensible colour.  The colour of kings.  Flattering, fitted bandeau style top, pretty flowing skirt, and - wait, are those BIRDS flocking around her ankles?  My goodness, she's got BIRDS FLOCKING AROUND HER ANKLES!  What kind of princess is this, who can command a whole flock of birds to encircle her lower legs?  I must devote the rest of my life to pleasing her."

So you'll get a pretty dress and a veritable horde of admirers who have made it their sole purpose to catering for your every whim, and all for just £14.  GOOD WORK, GEORGE.

about your art: The Little Illustrator at From the Wilde

One of the many advantages to following From the Wilde on Facebook is the wonderfully frequent (but not remotely spammy) posts detailing all the lovely new things they get in stock.  That's exactly how I found out about The Little Illustrator, creator of sweet prints like this one:

'Unlikely Friends' - £12

And this one:

'I Will Save You!' - £12

And my favourite, this one:

'What Did You Say?' - £12

They're all available on The Little Illustrator's page on From the Wilde, but whilst you're there, do make sure to peruse the rest of the shop as they've got some lovely things in recently.  Even better, do the necessary on their Facebook and Twitter and you can be as well-informed as me!

about your homewares: reversible leaves quilt at Urban Outfitters

£95 may seem like a lot of money to pay for a quilt, but what about when the quilt has two usable sides, both of which are very pretty?  That's the wonderful thing about the reversible leaves quilt at Urban Outfitters.  You can have it displaying the lovely colourful leafy side:

And then when you get bored, flip it over to the blossom-type side:

I think I'd probably keep it on the leaf side most of the time, and the blossom side would only get a look in when I accidentally spilled tea on it but couldn't be bothered cleaning it straightaway*.  The leaves are lovely:

I think this would be a perfect addition to my bedroom, and it's not too girly so the boyfriend can't complain.  Best get saving!**

*So most weeks.
**Donations welcome.

about your shoes: canvas espadrilles at New Look

As a general rule, I do not like espadrilles.  I believe this is an entirely irrational feeling caused by my mother buying me ugly espadrilles as a child, and I'm sure no one's to blame for this, but this type of shoe simply does not tickle my fancy.  Or so I thought.

New Look are currently stocking a range of pretty canvas espadrilles which have successfully made me question all that I've previously believed, and best of all is the price: £6.99!  SIX!  POUNDS!  NINETY NINE!  As my friend Poppy said, "that's cheap enough to make you buy them even if you don't like them".  There's loads of colours available, but the nicest by far are the gingham...

...and the red stripe...

They've also made me want to go to the seaside.  Now where's my bucket and spade...

about your kitchenalia: homegrown monogram mugs at Anthropologie

The boyfriend and I have a fairly impressive collection of mugs (certainly enough for the maximum amount of visitors we could fit into our flat to have at least three hot beverages using fresh vessel each time), and relatively small space in which to keep them which means it takes a truly special mug for me to even consider adding it to the collection.  Few make the cut, but I feel like these homegrown monogram mugs from Anthropologie stand a very good chance.

They're only £8 each, which is good value given their massive size - so big that your chances of experiencing 'tea disappointment'* are significantly lessened - and the monogrammed design means that those you live with have to be pretty cheeky to consider using them (unless they're making you a brew, in which case it's fine).  

*Tea disappointment, for those who don't know, is the special kind of sadness you feel upon lifting your mug for a sip only to find you've already finished your drink.  It's a serious issue and has been know to drive grown women to tears.

about your dress: maternity cream floral night shirt at Topshop

Don't be startled by the title of this post - I've not lost control of my senses, but I am genuinely suggesting wearing a nighty designed for pregnant ladies as a dress.  It's ok, I can justify it!  It's this lovely cream floral night shirt from Topshop's maternity range:

My reasoning is fivefold:

1) It's an absolute steal at £25 - Topshop seem quite generous when it comes to pricing their maternity range, presumably because they think you'll only be wearing it for a short period of time.

2) It's a sensible length so you could wear it in public environs.

3) It's not see through (see reason 2).

4) You just have to chuck a belt on it to tame the excess material designed for bump-coverage and you've got yourself a stylish shirt dress.
5) If you do happen to fall 'with child', you can still use it.

And if anyone laughs at you for wearing a night shirt as a dress, you can simply sent them my way.  My lack of social appropriateness and dirty mouth would love an interview with such a narrow-minded individual.

about your collars: nice neckwear at ASOS

Problem: you've got a shirt/dress/top, and you've had it so long you're massively bored of it BUT you can't afford to shell out for a new one, and you're allergic to Primark (I hear it happens).  Solution: invest in a collar.  You can then use it to breathe new life into a large chunk of your wardrobe for a pittance!  ASOS have cleverly spied the potential of the collar, with a section dedicated entirely to them - here are my favourites:

Bead and pearl Peter Pan collar, £15

Crochet collar, £12

Chiffon bow neck tie, £8

Pearl pointed collar, £15

That last one looks a little bit church-y in the picture, so here's it modelled by an ASOS-hired expert:

I'm not convinced that purchasing a collar will make me look as lovely as she does, but as Tesco's say, every little helps (so maybe I should buy five and wear them all at once...)

Nomday! about your painted pooches: dog necklaces at Meow Girl

Do you like dogs? I know people are usually dog or cat people, but, just to be my usual awkward self, I'm both. I love Geoff, my big fluffy ginger cat, but as you may remember from my previous posts, I'm a firm believer that 'one day my Fritz will come'.

As Fritz, my short-haired miniature daschund currently only exists in my mind, I do so like to see things that remind me of him, be that homewares or clothes or jewellery. So I was quite frankly elated when I was looking at Aussie shop Meow Girl's collection of painted miniature pooch necklaces and spotted dearest, darling Fritz on the end of a silver chain for a mere AUS$45 (£29.52 at current exchange rate, thanks expiate).

There's a whole host of the funniest little pups, including Ria's imaginary Pug, Pierre, for AUS $39 (about £23):

And Bill Sikes' dog Bulls Eye! Bulls Eye costs AUS$39, which is about £26. I know they are sort of ugly looking, but I quite like English Bull Terriers. Look, he's having a little sit down:

Also worth mentioning is the Chihuahua (ooh isn't that funny to write) for AUS$30, the Dalmatian, AUS$39 and the little Jack Russell AUS$39!

about your dress: rose print belted prom dress at Oasis

I've got an idea, and it sounds a bit 'out there', but just hear me out: I genuinely think it could be possible to force the weather to comply with our wishes through the power of our clothing.  Obviously this is entirely backed up by some Very Complicated Scientific Calculations*, which I would go into in detail but it would just be very boring and would detract from the point of this post, which is this: look how pretty this dress is:

It's £75 from Oasis, and my Very Complicated Scientific Calculations tell me that this is the ideal dress for reducing cloud cover and maximising sunshine.  You really can't argue with that.

*It's all to do with minimising cloud condensation nuclei.  That, and the fact the sun is a sucker for a girl in a nice dress.  It's fine, I have a masters in meteorology, you can totally trust me.

about your dress: Larch print dress at Monsoon

Now that I'm closer to 30 than 20, it might be time for me to fix up, look sharp and stop dressing like I've received a serious blow to the head.  Ah, who am I kidding?  I'll never stop loving my monster t-shirt and skull-covered maxi dress!  But perhaps I shall dip my toe in the waters of mature dressing by starting with this beautiful Larch print dress (£55) from Monsoon:

It's a very flattering shape with a very pretty print, and would probably command a bit more respect than my squirrel print dress*.  Sold!

*I say this, but perhaps if I wore said squirrel print dress to a Very Important Business Type Meeting (like I go to aaaaall the time), people might respect me out of fear.  You want to be careful when dealing with ladies who like to cover themselves in woodland creatures - they could flip at any moment.

about your kitchenalia: Geordie mugs at Hunkydory Home

I love Hunkydory Home for two reasons: 1) they are one of the finest purveyors of homewares and gifts in the whole world wide web, and 2) they hail from the great North East, just like me!  And now they're stocking two fantastic mugs featuring the dialect of kings to herald the latter of these facts.

They're £7.50, and ideal for the Geordie in your life (if you don't have one, you should get one.  They're very funny and often good in fights).  You could accompany the present with a Geordie card, like this one (£1.75):

The back even has a translation for all the Southerners amongst you, because we Geordies are nice like that.

Nomday! about your art: fan art by Liam Brazier

I'm writing this post, even though I'm a little bit frightened (and strangely excited) that any moment now, fifteen massive men wearing full SWAT gear are going to break through all the entrances to my house screaming, shine a torch in my eyes and bundle me into a van never to be seen again under the express instruction of George Lucas' copyright infringement scary badass legal collective. But you know what I'd say to them as they broke my typing fingers (yes, I'm a two finger typer. I know, it's totally messed up. But I'm still fast. I get on just fine with my two indexes, I'm just like the rest of you, I don't need no special treatment)? I'd say, in what I imagine to be a liberal accent:

"You can't suppress talent dude! The MAN George Lucas, May Peace Be Upon Him, is wrong to like, try and put financial boundaries on creativity dude! You can't OWN creativity brother! PEACE! We're spreading the message man, it's fear that stops you from sharing the magic. And we all know about fear man, fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering..."

Then probably one of them would kick me in the ovaries and I'd pass out and that would be the end of my story because it's getting a bit weird now, but anyway I really like these prints!

They're totally freaking awesome. Okay so maybe not all (or any) of you are fans of Star Wars, but Liam Brazier has managed to transform C-3PO, helping him to transcend his robotic nature and providing him with an elegant sense of dignity (and C-3PO is not an elegant character, he's *just* annoying).  He's lent the humble Stormtrooper a sense of ethereal gravitas; no longer just a clone, but a complex, fragmented, 3-dimensional character worthy of his own portrait, his own place on the mantle. The gloomy depths of the Bounty Hunter's helmet stare boldly into the eyes of the Viewer, daring us to gaze for a moment into the abyss. Okay so I'm borrowing heavily from my A-Level Art essays now, but seriously, I think these are ace and if you know anyone else who likes Star Wars, they probably will too.

Good old Liam is selling giclee prints of these bad boys at his inPRNT shop in various sizes, 12 x 18 inches for $20 and 18 x 24 inches for $40. They're on 100% cotton rag archival paper, which might not mean anything to you, but let me tell you as a photographer, it's blooming expensive and it basically means it will last forever (well, about 300 years actually, if kept in the right conditions).

It's not just Star Wars though...look, Superman too!

Probably best that we all buy these before George Lucas uses the force of his legal team to have him executed, because then they'll be worth four bajillion times the price you can buy them for now!

about your shop: Sparrow Avenue on Etsy

How does that song by Beyoncé go?  'If you like it then you should have put an animal on it' - is that right?  Well, it should have been, and I think the lady behind Etsy shop Sparrow Avenue would agree with me.  Based in Toronto, Canada, Sparrow Avenue specialises in screenprinted tea towels, accessories, and pillows (but right now it's mostly tea towels).

Almost all of the animals are printed from the shop owner's original drawings, and from what I gather, you can choose which design you want.  For example, the linen tea towel above (£11.29) features a rather friendly looking whale, but you could easily replace him with a bear, like the one on this tote bag (£15.68)...

...or a moose, like on this pillow (£28.22)...

...or a dog, or a bird, or a cat!  A veritable menagerie in your own home.

DISCLAIMER: Kudos for finding this shop must go to my colleague Janine (she of the Moleskine Passion Recipe Journal fame).  WELL DONE, JANINE.

about your competition: vote for Gift of the Year 2011 at Not On The High Street

Citizens of the UK!  Today is a very important day for voting.  That's right people, you can use your power as an individual to vote for Not On The High Street's Gift of the Year as part of The Make Awards 2011!  You can view the full list of candidates here, but this is what I'll be giving my vote to:

This fully customisable '...Likes' poster print by Rosie Robins (£38 - £52, depending on the size you want) is a beautiful way of showing someone how well you know them.  If someone bought me this I'd hang it in a prominent place so I'd always have a reminder of the things I like the best - just the thing to cheer me up if I'm feeling down.  That's also why I prefer the 'brights' colourway:

The voting system for The Make Awards does not allow for AV-style preferences, but if it did I'd give my second place vote to these Bespoke Map Hearts by Bombus (£44 each):

They're ideal for creating a visual reminder of those special places in your life, and would make a lovely anniversary gift if you chose the place you got engaged or married.  Alternatively, you could give one to yourself featuring the exact place you decided to dump that horrible person/job/dress that you'd had for ages but you don't know why you bought it in the first place because it really wasn't a very flattering fit and kinda clashed with your hair anyway.  LIBERATING.

Much more important than any other voting malarky that may or may not be going on today, I'm sure you'll agree*.

*I can say this because I already voted by post *smug*.

about your playsuit: blue spot halter playsuit at Topshop

Once again, I find myself using this blog to live vicariously through you.  As I've mentioned before, I cannot wear playsuits: I simply do not have the figure for them.  On the rare occasions when I've mistakenly tried one on, I've nearly deafened those in the near vicinity with my howls of disgust upon spying my reflection.  They are not for me.  HOWEVER, they might be for you!  And if they are, let me present to you The Nicest Playsuit I Have Ever Found Ever™:

It's £50 from Topshop, and I think it's worth every penny.  If you do purchase one, be a doll and send me some pictures of you in it so that I may photoshop my face onto yours and pretend I look as good as you do*.  Much appreciated.


*Did you like the way I cunningly distracted you from my slightly creepy comment by immediately following it with a compliment?  Smooth.

about your shop: the Thrift Shop London

Whilst pootling around the internet yesterday on an entirely un-blog-related mission, I accidentally stumbled upon a little treasure in the form of the Thrift Shop London.  You may be surprised to hear that it's based in London (duh), was formed by university sweethearts Lauren and Thumilan (aww) and has only been up and running for a matter of weeks (hot stuff!).  But the absolute best thing about this store (better, even, than the very pretty banner) is the content: lovely, AFFORDABLE vintage/vintage inspired goods.  And you can handily click 'View all', which makes them very helpful in my incredibly lazy books.  Here are some of the gems I found during my intrepid exploration of the Thrift Shop London:

This pretty size 12 80s summer dress is ideal for ladies who like to channel a bit of Cyndi Lauper in their everyday dressing, and is an absolute steal at £22:

The Thrift Shop London also caters to those who have a taste for eccentric knitwear - I'm particularly taken by this House On A Hill jumper (size 10, £16):

There's plenty of accessories too, like this ludicrously cheap £12 Nautical Vintage Satchel...

...and these Playtime Vintage Shoes (size 6, £15), which have managed to make me like a pair of espadrilles:

Good work, shoes.

You can also visit the Thrift Shop London to satisfy your vintage homewares needs.  Vintage Wedgewood for £8?  Yes please!

Like all vintage stores, the items featured above are one offs, so if you fall in love with any of them you'll need to be quick off the mark to avoid disappointment.  If you do miss out, don't cry!  There's plenty more where they came from!

The Thrift Shop London is definitely a keeper, and my bank and I really love the way they have shunned the high mark ups which most other vintage sellers think they can get away with.  Make sure you pay them a visit soon (I'd advise checking out their very lovely 'About Us' page), or befriend them through their Facebook or Twitter.  They seem like the sort of Nice People who'd appreciate you stopping by :)