about your necklace: Time for Romance Steampunk Watch Pendant from TrashAndTrinkets

I think the reason why I like the Steampunk genre so much is the emphasis on visible mechanics.  I like to know how things work, and see what's going on inside things, so things made out of cogs and gears therefore appeal to me.  This Time for Romance Steampunk Watch Pendant from TrashAndTrinkets on Etsy is one of the most beautiful pieces of Steampunk jewellery I've ever seen, as it manages to display the inner workings of the clock in a lovely delicate way:

It's $68 plus $4.99 shipping to the UK, but I think its timeless (ha! I used the word timeless in a post about a watch pendant!) design will bring the price per wear waaaaaay down.  Usual rules apply: buy me it and I'll love you forever.

about your jewellery: Helen Woodward Design

I have a little friend called Helen.  She is small and very funny.  Oh shit, wait, that's the beginning of Charlie and Lola.  My bad.  Helen is funny though, but the bestest thing about her is her magical jewellery-making skills, which you can find at Helen Woodward Design.  I don't want to do her an injustice, so here's what she does in her own words:

'Designed for all occasions from the everyday to the special event, each piece is personally handcrafted. I have developed a distinctive signature style using vintage beads, semi precious gems, crystals, charms and freshwater pearls.'

Helen buys vintage chains and beads and quirky attachments, cleans them up good and proper, and makes them into the prettiest necklaces, bracelets, rings and earrings you could imagine.  Since some of the parts she uses are very limited (some are even one of a kind), you feel Extra Special when wearing them.

This 'Jenny' necklace (£18) is probably my favourite (hence why I own it) - it's simple but beautiful, and goes with almost everything.

The 'Violet' heart pearl bracelet and ring (£20 and £12 respectively) are typical of Helen's style.  Elasticated to fit on any sized wrist or finger, these are ideal for outfits which call for something other than a necklace.

Helen also accepts commissions (she's lovely like that) and has started making personalisable* jewellery available to buy online, like this lovely 'Ines' silver heart and pearl initial necklace (£38).  Buy one for your loved one and it might serve as a reminder of her name, in case you nearly call her by your ex's.  Those situations are *awkward*.

If you're trying to butter me up, I suggest you buy me this 'Cleo' vintage clear lucite charm bracelet.  It reminds me of something my Grandma would have worn, back in The Olden Days.  And it's only £18, which is definitely cheaper than getting me drunk.

So go!  Visit Helen Woodward Design!  Tell her I sent you.  I doubt it'll get you anything, but I'll look like a good friend.

*I don't care that spellcheck pulled me up on this word.  It exists.

about your bag: Peter Jensen Watermelon Bag at Urban Outfitters

Fan of Dirty Dancing?  Of course you are.  Get this:

I don't even like it that much, I just want it so I can say "I carried a watermelon" Every. Single. Day.

It's pretty pricey at £60, but if you have always wanted a watermelon bag, it's ideal.  Get yours here at Urban Outfitters.

about your necklace: Moustache necklace at Tatty Devine

You know how much I like moustaches.  Here's some evidence, and here's some more.  And a bit more, just in case you hadn't got the point.  This is why I need this moustache necklace in my life:

It's £24 from the wonderful Tatty Devine, and it would be the ideal fake moustache; you could carry it around your neck all day with no bother, then the moment you need a tash, BINGO!  Just whack it up into position!  It would definitely look better than my current emergency tash technique*.

*I pull my hair across under my nose, then wedge it there with my top lip.  It's not hot.

about your shop: free shipping at Love Hearts and Crosses

You may remember a few weeks ago I blogged about The White Rabbit's Pocket Watch necklace from the wonderful Love Hearts and Crosses - purveyors of the finest fun jewellery - and now I have a treat for you!  The lovely people at said lovely shop have given me a code for my lovely readers which will get you free delivery for all orders over £15; just enter ABYDPP at the checkout to redeem.

The hard part is choosing what to buy (sadly I cannot afford everything, even with free delivery).  Here are some suggestions...

These Alice in Wonderland Tea Party earrings are absolutely wonderful, and would make a brilliant present for my lovely friend Maria who owns a loose leaf tea company (www.goldenmonkeyteacompany.co.uk - check it out).  They're £10.

I love how pretty and delicate this little silver bow ring is.  And it's only £6!  Can you say bargain?

If you like gardening, or are a nice person and would like to buy a green-fingered friend a present, why not part with £8 of your hard earned cash in exchange for this lovely watering can necklace?

I've had a bit of good news today, so I'm finally going to purchase the wonderful typewriter necklace I've been coveting.  Don't forget, if no one else buys you presents, you can always treat yourself.  Let me know if you do!  The free delivery code (ABYDPP, in case you're too lazy to scroll back up) is valid until the 30th, but don't hang around too long umming and aahing over what to buy - some items are close to being sold out and as the saying goes, you snooze, you lose!

about your shop: Selfridges sale

I imagine heaven to be a bit like Selfridges (the one in Birmingham - I find it a bit more welcoming than the others), except free.  I could eat Lucky Charms whilst wearing fancy clothes and relaxing atop a pile of cushions made from the feathers of birds so soft they could be clouds.  So I was understandably excited when Selfridges opened their ecommerce site earlier this year; obviously it's not the same as being in the promised land shop itself, but the Pretty is still there, calling out "Ria, Ria" in its angel's voice.

Anyway, we all know I love a good sale, and the newly-opened Selfridges sale does not disappoint.  Here are my most favourite reduced delights...

This bow print jersey dress (See by Chloe) has been reduced from £180 to £80.  If you're as clever as me, you'll realise that's a whole £100 off.  A HUNDRED POUNDS.  That's a saving big enough to buy...

...these Babelish courts by Nine West (£39 reduced from £80, but only available in size 3)...

...and with the addition of £14, you could also buy these Bloch jazz shoes!  You might think £75 is a lot to pay for such basic footwear, but I would wear these so much that the cost per wear would be in pence, not pounds.  And they're reduced from £120!  It'd almost be rude not to buy them.

But if I could only have one thing, it could only be this:

Oh, HELLO quilted leather tote by Marc Jacobs. I know you're an amazing price at £447 (reduced from £895), but you'll be sold out soon and I just cannot produce the funds in time.  I will forever be sorry.

See? In heaven that bag would be FREE.

about your shoes: T-strap sandals from Gap

I have a favourite pair of sandals: they're brown, and they have a gold butterfly thing on.  I love them so much I bought them in two colours, although to be honest, the silver pair rarely get a look in.  But as the old saying goes, woman cannot live by one pair of sandals alone!  That's fine, you would think.  Everywhere sells sandals.  You can easily get your hands on a multitude of the summery foot-clothes in all different shapes and sizes.  Unfortunately, I'm a Picky Bastard, and I have been looking for sandals now for several weeks and was about to give myself a big old #FAIL when I came across these in a magazine (probably Grazia.  It's always Grazia):

They're £16.50 from Gap, but since Gap are lame and don't have a UK online shop yet, you'll have to leave the safe embrace of Teh Internets and go out into The Real World.  I'd seen them in Cambridge, but they only had teeny tiny sizes left, so I had to journey to Solihull (about half an hour from Stratford) to get my hands on these babies.  Ohmygoodness it was worth it.  They're the single most comfortable pair of sandals which have ever had the misfortune to meet my horrible feet.  You can sort of tell from the picture above that the sole is padded, and the cotton strap (elasticated at the back for easy fit) is as soft as a the fur of a baby snow leopard (I imagine).  They come in more designs as well, check it:

Just get yourself involved.  I'm saying this for your own good.

about your jewellery: Rob Ryan for Tatty Devine

If anyone were to ask me who my favourite artist was, my answer would be immediate, simple, and sure: Rob Ryan.

In case you are unfamiliar with the sheer genius of the man, Mr Ryan specialises in paper cutting, laser cutting and screen printing, and you can find out more about him at his website or his blog, or even by perusing his marvellous Etsy shop.  Not so long ago, Rob produced a wonderful collection of jewellery in collaboration with those crazy cats at Tatty Devine, and I'd like to take this opportunity to present to you my favourites.

Personally, I would never call myself a romantic; if I'm in the mood (not that kind of mood, pervert), I can be lovely, but as a general rule I will call you a twat if you say anything which could be construed as soppy.  Even if you really do think I'm lovely, just buy me a beer or something and tell me I'm "safe as fuck".  Regardless of this, I can't help but melt a little inside when I see the beautifully constructed words and images created by Rob Ryan's head, heart and hand, and it's wonderful to see these translated onto jewellery - something you can physically carry around with you all the time.

A lot of Rob's work is wonderful as gifts to your beloved, and his This Bell Will Ring... necklace (£210), inspired by his famous cutting of the same name, is no exception:

But it's always nice to buy something for yourself too.  I fell in love with this Everything I Love That Lives In My Heart brooch the second I saw it because for me, it's all true.  

If I had £190, I would spend it on this and treasure it forever.

about your miscellany: Cath Kidston at ASOS

Here's some maths:

((Cath Kidston + ASOS) + Low, Low Prices) Free Delivery = Happy Ria

The low, low prices in question are specifically as a result of ASOS Outlet, the cheap and cheerful younger sibling of the mighty online giant ASOS.  What, you want examples?  Oh, ok.

How's about this awesomely cute London umbrella gift pack?

By the way, for 'gift pack', read 'comes in a pretty box'.  I'm cool with that; you can keep the box at home to put "things" in whilst carrying around the handy sized umbrella in your handbag.  It's £12 of the RRP at £15.

Going to any festivals this summer?  Work on a farm?  Then you need wellies.  It's ok though, wellies don't have to be boring and green, they can be pretty and floral!  Check out these Spring Wellington Boots (£22 instead of £38):

I assume you get a pair.

There's much more Cath Kidston pretty available on the main ASOS site, including lots from the ever-growing CK jewellery range.  My favourite is this Antique Brass and Floral Long Detail Long Oval Locket Pendant Necklace (didn't fancy calling it something catchier?):

I'm a bit of a sucker for long lockets, so this was bound to catch my eye, but there's loads else there if little picture-holders don't float your boat.  A lot of it is reduced as well; the above necklace is £22.80, reduced from £38.  I can't help it, it's like my fingers will only find bargains!

about your mugs: Moustache mugs from Hunkydory Home

If you are sometimes attracted to the oh-so-catchy titles of my Posterous entries, or know me in "Real Life", then you probably know that I like moustaches.  I don't know why; perhaps I'm just terribly jealous that I'm unable to grow one myself, being a delicate lady-type and all.  One of my "hilarious" habits is to pull my hair across my top lip and play tash-pretend, and let me tell you girls: the boys love it.  Probably.

This, coupled with my love for tea, makes these moustache mugs from Hunkydory Home an ideal present:

I say present, because the set of three is £38, and that's too pricey for me.  But if you love me, and want to buy these for me, think of it this way: it's technically six mugs, because when you turn the mug around, it sports a different tash!  You can also buy the mugs individually for £14, in which case I'd get the Maurice-Poirot design:

about your dress: Tara Matthews backless maxi dress at The Outnet

Even though I'm still sulking about the debacle that was The Outnet's £1 sale, I love the object of this post too much to not share with you.  I know, I know, I'm such a giver.

I have a small weakness for dresses with animals on, and considering humans are animals, this backless maxi dress by Tara Matthews at The Outnet counts.

It has a print of Napoleon (Bonapart, not Dynamite) and Josephine, his first wife.  Perfect for the stylishly discerning French history buff.  Best part is, it's £107.80, reduced from £196 - leaving you lots of money to further your collection of clothing featuring past military leaders.  Winner.